It's Almost Thanksgiving...

So let's talk about Christmas. I've been thinking about the Christmas cartoons we've all been watching since we were children. Ever notice how messed up they all are? Let's break it down.

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Synopsis: After relentless bullying, two underage boys run away from home only to hook up with a middle-aged man interested in mining for gold.


Frosty the Snowman

Synopsis: A group of children steal from their teacher, using witchcraft to create a living man of snow. They then illegally cross the border to evade justice.


A Charlie Brown Christmas

Synopsis: A young boy struggles with depression while his friends and family ignore the warning signs and laugh at his pain. A small, dying tree becomes his only friend.


The Nutcracker

Synopsis: A girl is given a gift by her creepy German uncle, who then breaks it in front of her. She cries, then falls into a hallucinogenic coma.

Ah, the good old values we were brought up on. I hope everyone is feeling warm and yule-loggy. Merry Christmas everybody!